


Peter Parker is from Generation Z

by RockyPond



Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: generation z, vine references
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-26
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-04-28 05:17:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14442168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RockyPond/pseuds/RockyPond
Summary: Really it was Steve’s fault. After all he was the one who had the audacity to say “Everything’s going to be fine.”“Why the fuck you lying? Why you always lying?”—A series of one shots that embrace the fact that Peter Parker is from Generation Z. Because I too am a 16 year old who loves vines and making references to ‘old’ movies.





	1. Why You Always Lying?

Peter couldn’t help it. Just something about the idea of dying made his mind wander, away from the giant monster in front of them and to the most pointless stuff.   
Really it was Steve’s fault. After all he was the one who had the audacity to say “Everything’s going to be fine.” As they faced down an acid spitting beast.  
So Peter said the first thing that came into his head.  
It didn’t even occur to him he probably shouldn’t swear in front of a national hero.  
“Why the fuck you lying? Why you always lying?” He sang, not tearing his eyes away from his future murderer, mister goo-man as he had decided to call him.   
Peter surprisingly heard a voice join him from beside him.  
“Mhmm oh my god, stop fucking lying” Shuri sang, eyes wide as she held up her gun.  
The other avengers all looked at the two teenagers with a clear question; are you two insane?  
The two teenagers let out a few nervous chuckles before launching into the battle with the adults trailing behind them.  
It was worth it when twenty minutes they were lying in the acid-burned grass, discussing vines while the other Avengers calmed down after the battle. Tony looked over at them, before taking off a piece of his armour that had nearly been burned to the skin and just said;  
“Fucking generation Z”


	2. Chapter 2

The Avengers came back to the compound after they had left Peter and Shuri there whilst they fought a minor villain. They were not expecting to find the two in the middle of the living room, spraying whipped cream into their mouths and laughing hysterically.  
“How did you take down Captain America?” Shuri spoke with an exaggerated American accent.  
Peter responded with his own exaggerated German accent. “We shot him in the legs because his shield is the size of a dinner plate and he’s an idiot.”  
The two laughed harder before going back to their phones. Shuri looked up and she pushed Peter in the side, pointing at the Avengers.  
Peter turned around, whipped cream bottle poised ready to spray into his mouth. He quickly lowered the bottle and waved. “Hey guys!”  
The group looked around, tearing their eyes away from the two teens to look around the room.  
Whipped cream had been sprayed everything, a couch had been turned over and nerf bullets were scattered around the room. There were also papers strewn everywhere and webs covered every corner of the room.  
They all turned back to face the two teenagers. Peter and Shuri sat there for a few seconds in silence before both scrambling up suddenly and bolting from the room.  
“Should we chase after them?” Tony asked, not sure where to even start cleaning up.   
“No, that’s the fastest I have ever seen Shuri run in her life. I don’t think we’d catch them.” T’Challa responded.


	3. Al-ki-hol

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony should really stop drinking the al-ki-hol.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was inspired by this work of art: http://vm.tiktok.com/eJSMeT/ by Dakota. Dakota is genuinely my favourite Tik-Toker of all time. I love them.  
> Dakota is non-binary and if I see any of you biTCHES misgender them in the comments I swear to God I wi-  
> *cough cough* um... Enjoy this chapter... uh, yeah.  
> (But seriously, use they/them pronouns for Dakota if you mention them in the comments. I’ll delete any comments that misgender them. Even if the comment is nice)

Looking back on it, Tony should have known this would only go wrong. After all, Peter was there. On his phone. With his headphones in.  
Everything goes wrong when Peter is on his phone with his headphones in.  
Tony called out to Happy to bring him a glass of water, but then remembered he’d given all of the staff the day off.  
Damn him and his charitable thinking.  
He got up to get himself the glass of water, acutely aware of Peter’s eyes following him.  
He looked for one of his bottles in the fridge but finding nothing, decided he’d have to get some from the sink.  
It wasn’t a total loss, his tap water was colder and cleaner than most filtered water on the planet. As he filled the glass with water, he noticed Peter getting up.  
He turned the tap off and went to take a sip but was stopped by Peter grabbing the glass.  
“What are we doing in the liquor aisle, your doctor said you can’t have any alcohol.”  
Tony felt his soul drain out from his body and through the floor. “It’s water Peter.”  
“No Mr. Stark, you can’t drink this. You can’t have any al-ki-hol.” Peter said, mispronouncing the last word.  
“It’s water.” “No, it’s al-ki-hol.” “It’s water Peter, you just watched me get it from the tap.” Tony was silently begging him with his eyes, to just let him have his water in peace. He once again raised the glass to his lips.  
“NO. MR. STARK, NO!” Peter ripped the glass out of his hands and poured it on the floor.  
Tony’s soul had now reached Hell. How fun.  
The two of them stated at each other, Tony in complete and utter disappointment and Peter trying to gage how much further he could take this.  
He lifted the glass, keeping eye contact with Mr. Stark. He pursed his lips, almost begging the billionaire to stop him.  
When he only saw indifference in the eyes of the man whose soul was now being batted around like a ping poll ball down in Hell, he stated “This bitch empty. YEET.”  
And with that defiant, majestic, triumphant battle cry, the glass sailed through the air before smashing into a million pieces against a wall.  
Oh, would you look at that; Lucifer himself now has possession of Tony’s soul and is rejoicing in the chance to torture the hero. He decided a vine compilation would do the trick.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did not beta this so like oops, for any mistakes.  
> Seriously though, if you actually take the time to go back and reread your newly written work before posting it, I admire your strength.


End file.
